| English Composition | Spring 2009 | Palomar College |
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Number the paragraphs in the essay and make your comments on each paragraph in your e-mail message or on a separate sheet of paper. In reading the essay, put yourself in the position of someone who doubts the thesis statement. Read the essay critically.
1. Is there a clear contract and does the essay fulfill the contract? After reading the first paragraph (or to the end of the introduction is the introduction is clearly more than one paragraph) write a short summary of what you think the contract is. After you have finished reading the essay, reread your statement of the contract. How well did the essay fulfill the contract?
2. Does each sentence in each paragraph lead to or from the central point (the topic sentence)? After each paragraph number, write the topic sentence of that paragraph.
3. Does the reader answer the question "How do you know?" of every major claim in the essay? Are there places where a reader who doubted what the writer was saying would not have a clear idea of how the writer found out what she was claiming to be true? For each paragraph, indicate how the writer answered the question "How do you know?" Or indicate where the writer failed to answer that question and for what claims.
4. Does the essay continually engage you, or are there places where the writer seems to be talking to himself or to no one? For each paragraph, indicate how it could be made more relevant to you, how the writer could address you more directly.
5. Does each paragraph advance the thesis? Do you constantly find your questions answered and new ideas or material introduced in each paragraph? For any paragraph that does not seem to be moving forward or that does not contain new material, indicate this.
6. Does the whole essay support a clear thesis? After you have read the essay, but before reading the thesis statement at the end, write what you think the thesis of the essay is. Then comment on the writer’s thesis. How could the essay be strengthened either by revising the thesis or by better supporting the thesis? Are there parts of the essay that seem irrelevant to the rest?
7. Is the essay convincing? Why or why not?
8. What changes could make this a better essay?
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01/05/09