When I personalize, I assume the guilt for things that go wrong outside of my control. I see things as my fault that I couldn't have prevented. In a somewhat more subtle form, I may assume moral guilt for a mistake or an error which is morally neutral. Blame is the same cognitive distortion, operating in reverse. Instead of taking responsibility on myself, I shift it to somebody else. Behind both forms of this cognitive distortion lies the assumption that if anything goes wrong, it must be somebody's fault. There are no mistakes, only crimes, and the criminals must be found and punished.
It's easy for students to fall into personalization or blame in a rather subtle form. This is especially true in a writing class. Writing is very personal. But your writing (or your journal or your math exercises) is not you. If you personalize your own work to the point where criticism of your work seems like an attack on you personally, you are yielding to this cognitive distortion. If you personalize your work too much, you will be afraid to change it, and you will never improve as a writer. You may also tend to blame your readers for the failings of your writing. It is normal to make mistakes. If you find that you are embarrassed to share your work or that you feel ashamed of making errors, it may be because you are personalizing.
© 1996 John Tagg